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I know you will likely never see this, but I love you more then you will ever know. I say this here because to say this to your face would only annoy you. You and our 2 boys is all I have ever wanted and all I will ever need. We have hurt eachother alot through our 15 years but I wouldnt trade it for anything. I have missed being your best friend for years and accept some responsability for that. This is simply my vent for now as I try and give you some space as to not push you further away. I did have a great time at the park watching our boys skate and eating dinner late into the dark. I enjoy cuddleing on the couch and snuggling in bed even though I wake up hard as a rock most days due to my strong attraction to you. I truly long for the days when you felt the same way, but I do appreciate the glimpse into the past you give me when you have been drinking a feel frisky. While its a rarity and I read way to much into it I am sure it still feels really nice to feel wanted by you. I am an attractive man(not perfect) so there are plenty of girls that show interest, but as you know all to well I am a professional ass-hole and that works well to fend off the ones that well simply are not YOU. Part of me hopes you see this and part of me doesnt, but one thing I am fairly certain about is you will likely never see it. With all the love I posess I love you and you will always have my heart!