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:) Divorced adult ready nsa dating ie I'm a lesbian. I KNOW I'M A LESBIAN. I have known since I was 11 years old and now I am 23. Over the past 5 years, I have told quite a few people that I am bisexual or that I am sure I am a lesbian. I have messed around with a couple of girls but they both screwed me over. I want to be with a girl. I haven't been in a relationship with a guy in almost 2 years because I KNOW that they won't make me happy. I was engaged once to my best friend but I told him I just couldn't do it because I knew I would be living a lie. That's the thing I tell guys I am sorry but I like girls and then they say "oh well that's okay we can be with a girl". NO I want it to be me and her. And I want the whole world to us happy together. So why am I so to scream I AM A LESBIAN! I think it all the time. I meet new people and the first thing I want to say is that. But then I am afraid they judge me. I used to be in denial about my homosexuality. I grew up in a very very strict environment with a very homophobic mother. I constantly told myself "no don't think those things" or "oh you are just going through a phase". After years of discontent I know its because I am not being my true self. Why am I so? I just moved to for college and I looked forward to being able to come out in such an accepting city. But I am still. I do not like bisexual girls because I do not just want to be a phase or play date. But then sometimes I am attracted to guys (only as far as their looks) so I am afraid to start a relationship with a lesbian and then hurt her. But I am not happy with guys. I came out to my dad and stepmom recently but I am afraid to tell my mother and sister because they are very conservative. And I am afraid to tell girls that I just came out (and am only partially out) because I do not want them to think I'm not serious. I am serious about this. I want to be a lesbian. I think I just need some friends that make me feel more comfortable. As as I find a girl, I tell the world that I am a lesbian. But why can't I just do it now? Why am I so afraid? I got out of class the other day and I saw on the bulletin board that my college's LGBT club was having an introductory meeting in 10 minutes. I wanted to go. But I just stood there staring at the flyer and then walked to my car and went home. Why? just looking horny sexy milfs in Montgomery New York for a friend to chat with w4m Im just looking for someone who wants to chat through email...Im NOT looking to exchange numbers or meet up. Im asian, i work full time... If anyone is interested email me, thanx

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